Creating space, creating a habit

I've been decluttering my craftroom.  I still have a little more to go, including a box of stuff on the floor that I can't seem to find places for, and some things to take to school. I'm giving away some fabric and I've sorted through my scrapbooking things. But I still have a room packed full of things.

During last year I found this little 2-seater sofa at an op shop, and it changed everything about the room. But until now I had no time to really make it all work. 

Originally, I had these cute vintage velvet wingchairs in my craftroom. I loved the look of these chairs, they were a bargain, were in good condition and had just the vintage vibe I wanted. 

This is how I had the sitting area of my craft room set up originally

(on the other side of the room is my desk and most of my craft supplies) 

... and then I rearranged when we inherited this lovely leadlight cabinet.

But the trouble was that the chairs only looked cute. They didn't feel so great. When I sat on them I felt both constricted by the arms and wobbly on the seat cushion. My great plans of sitting daily to read the bible and pray on these chairs came to nothing. We sat on them on Friday nights for date night, and the rest of them time they just held piles of stuff, and I wondered why I didn't sit on them more. 

Then came the sofa.

Not vintage. Not the best colour. But comfortable.

A real game-changer.

And now I get to my new habit:

Each night I light this little candle

I open my little pencil case (a gift from a Korean student) and take out a pen.

(I keep the matches in there, also)

I open my bible

And my day-to-a-page diary (Aldi)

and I get reading and writing and praying.

You see, when I was younger I read my bible everyday, but as I got older, I found it hard to make the time.  This year I've discovered a few other things about me:

A lighted candle helps to remind me to stay and read and think, not to jump up and do something else. It makes the time a bit special (and smells amazing, the nicest vanilla candle I ever met ;)

A diary with pretty pages, smooth paper and the perfect sized page and just one page seems doable, compared to my old burnout style of writing pages and pages in a journal one day and not touching it again for months.

It helps to have a colourful bible and pencil case that coordinate, because I'm just that kind of girl.

A reading plan from my minister for our church to read Matthew 14-28 in the month of January has really helped. Especially when I recoloured it and made it pretty to match my diary ;)

I have a couple, but just a couple, of other reading and resource books in the pile for when I have extra time.  I plan to re-read the Jesus Storybook Bible again soon, I just love it, and it's not only for kids.

The other thing I've done is moved some suitcases which were piled up in the centre of the room. They were handy for storage and putting things on when I'm sitting at my desk, but not worth it in the end because of the cramped feeling they gave me. I also had a nest of tables in here, which felt rickety and not quite right. Now I manage with the little table attached to the standard lamp. And in case you're worried, I still have the olive velvet wingchairs, one in the craftroom next to the sofa, and one in the living room. And I still have some furniture from this room and elsewhere that I need to find space for, hmmm.

I'm so pleased that I was able to use this holiday time to manage the space and feel of this room, and to finally use it to accomplish one of my original aims of this room - to have a quiet space to sit and read and pray each day.

Easter Weekend

So grateful for some slow.

After a very busy and tiring few weeks - a season of working hard and driving a lot and

eating different foods and supporting an HSC student and trying to keep on top of things at home and whole lot of other things,

it is bliss to be able to slow down a little.

On Friday we remembered Christ's death.
This year I am struck anew at what Jesus endured, and how unworthy

I am to receive his gift of life, bought through his death.

I broke my diet with these paleo hot cross buns. (Don't tell my nutritionist)

Which looked and smelt the thing but were an interesting texture, something like a shortcake. But to one currently deprived of baked goods and sweet foods they were amazing and very much enjoyed, while watching We Bought a Zoo, and over the next day until finally they disappeared - baked to boiled eggs and avocado snacks for me.

Yesterday we celebrated my Dad's birthday with family, while outside

rain poured down. More breaking of the diet. Last night we enjoyed Chariots of Fire, the first time the girls had seen it.

Today I woke and read John 19, about the empty tomb, and Jesus appearing to the women, and to his disciples. For the first time in years, excitement bubbled up in me at the story of Jesus' rising, his power over death.

The sunshine after the rain was a promise of a great day.

Another church service, with old friends and new, to celebrate together.

 

I arrived home to the smell of roast lamb, Steve had started it cooking in a slow oven

while we were out. I sat on the sofa, feeling slow again, enjoying my first square of chocolate in a long time - a pure chocolate and coconut nectar variety. An Easter treat, with permission of my nutritionist!

I set the table, using a white damask cloth that belonged to my mother-in-law.

Steve took out the lamb to rest before carving. I picked flowers and decorated the table for Easter,

looking forward to a family meal.

But alas, Laura turned a cartwheel in the living room while

we served up the dinner, banged a foot into my occasional table (that I use for morning and afternoon tea every day), smashed it, and then was so upset that she refused to join us at dinner, or later.

The three of us were left to enjoy our dinner as best as we could.

Later Steve and I played music together, and I went for a walk in the sunshine.

Two good things, but not what we had envisaged for the afternoon.

Life is not perfect, is it?

Jesus has power over death, and I trust in that,

but we still have to deal with the nitty-gritty -

the broken table, the gravy that isn't right (and sticks to everything!),

the rifts between people, a bedroom door that stays shut.

I'm not so great at all that - at knowing when to act, and when to let things lie.

Or at dealing with the frustrations when my plans don't work,

or others suffer because of the actions of one.

Or coping with seasons of extreme busyness that leave me

unwilling to do anything but curl into a ball and look after myself.

It feels like it's time to process all these thoughts,

the slurry of all that happened in March, and the expectation of new things ahead,

to pray and to listen better to God, to learn from Him and others,

to close out the world for a bit and focus on family, resting, reading, and being slow.

We have nothing planned for tomorrow, which is a rare thing.

We're looking forward to a holiday together soon.

With the end of daylight saving* last night , the sun has set already at 5.30, 

the next season of cosy dark evenings has begun.

Soon I'll be standing by a lakeside photographing sunsets over the water;

being slow, and wishing I could bottle that for the rest of the year.

I hope you've had a slow Easter too.

* * *

*Yesterday I found out that it's 'daylight saving', not 'daylight savings'. Who knew?

Winter Evening

Brrr! It's cold outside.

The girls and I came home this afternoon

from a church weekend away,

not far away, just a couple of valleys over, really.

We had a wonderful time.

Talks on Ecclesiastes (and Hebrews, for the girls)

by visiting speakers; getting to know a young African man

our church is sponsoring through bible college;

chatting, crocheting and a campfire;

a family fun night that really was fun;

a walk in the late afternoon sun past lovely properties, 

with more chatting, as we spotted scarecrows and vegetable patches;

late-night port and playing Articulate;

camp food that even I could eat;

good times reading the bible, thinking, discussing and learning.

And now we are home,

which is always a good place to be.

There's a bit of unpacking mess around,

and some rest and sleep to catch up on.

After a sit on the sofa reading some favourite blogs

I felt energetic enough to do some baking.

Steve and I made these carob cookies,

which are super-easy and yummy.

Emily has been finishing off an ancient history essay,

and Laura is nursing a sore foot, she had a scooter stack

while we were at the campsite, a sock and shoe were casualties,

as well as her foot, which has a sort of burn from the bitumen.

(At the time of Laura's spill I was frantically doing a jigsaw puzzle of 

Romans 1:16 with ten or so other people, to earn 30 points

for our team, so much more fun than it sounds, 

especially when we won ;-)

Just as well we have those crutches Laura chose once at the op shop ...

It's not often I would wear a polar fleece jacket inside

and still be sitting or hovering right by the heater, 

but this afternoon I am.

There has been a gorgeous sunset,

I braved the chill winds to get some photos.

Tomorrow we go back to normal routine, 

but just for two days,

then the girls head to school camps,

leaving Steve and I home alone in the old house ...

... I guess we'll manage somehow ...

So, it's been a good weekend.  Lots to think about
and lots to appreciate, both there, and back home.
God is good.

Moreover, when God gives someone wealth and possessions, 
and the ability to enjoy them, to accept their lot 
and be happy in their toil—this is a gift of God. 
They seldom reflect on the days of their life, 
because God keeps them occupied with gladness of heart.

- Ecclesiastes 5:19-20

I can hear!

Yesterday my surgeon removed most of the packing in my ear,

and I can hear!

Of course, I have been able to hear all along, really,

but only in my left ear, and then for the last 5 years

I've had some (somewhat distorted) hearing 

via a hearing aid in my right ear.

But now, I'm hearing clearly in stereo! Woohoo!

And over time it will get even better.

In fact, most things are just too loud, my brain needs to adjust.

The girls have been at band camp so things have been quiet around here,

this afternoon I will see how I go with a full household of noise!

In the meantime, I'm still pretty tired and am watching lots of TV,

enjoying reading blogs, reading and crocheting.

It's a hard life, but someone has to do it.

A week on, I've been blessed with more cards and flowers

from friends and students, people are so kind.

I feel that this post should have photos of all the things

I'm enjoying hearing now, but that might wait for another time.

Seeing all the bright flowers and cards 

reminds me of my happiness

that the worst of the post-surgery times are over,

and that it has all been worth it.

After months of anxiety and planning and questions,

a quiet joy has settled over my life.

Something that was lost for so long has been restored.

Then will the eyes of the blind be opened
    and the ears of the deaf unstopped.
 Then will the lame leap like a deer,
    and the mute tongue shout for joy.
Water will gush forth in the wilderness
    and streams in the desert.

Isaiah 35:5-6

God is good.

Don't you think He gives us small tastes

of his kingdom now?

   

Thank you for your well wishes, too.

They mean a lot to me.

I hope you have a lovely day in your neck of the woods!

Psalm 23 at the Lake

 

This last week we have had a much-needed holiday.

Plenty of time for rest and contemplation.

And oh, the lake.

How could I help but think of Psalm 23?

Easter Blessings

“He himself bore our sins” in his body on the cross, 

so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; 

“by his wounds you have been healed.”

1 Peter 2:22-25

Wide and high and deep

Printed and hand-stamped inserts

to match a set of Kmart notebooks.

It's been good to do something creative here and there in stolen moments.

Stationery and fabric design trends are so close to stamping trends these days,

it's easy to find stamps and inks in my stash that coordinate with most things I might buy.

(well ... that and the fact that I have a rather large stamp collection ;-)

I will adhere these inside the front covers, and the ladies in my bible study group

will use these books to keep notes and prayer points.

We're studying the book of Ephesians this term,

so I picked one of my favourite passages.

Lately ...

A month has gone by since I last posted.

Life has been busy, and few photos taken.

But  ... ready? 

Here I go - one month in one post:

The term is drawing to a close,

and once again I am feeling that I haven't

achieved anything.

Instead, we've been taking each day as it comes.

Laura has been suffering from daily migraines,

sometimes with nausea and overheating,

and ongoing vision problems

(which may or may not be related to the migraines).

She has missed a lot of school.

They are not bad migraines, 

often just a mild headache,

but she rarely has a pain-free day,

and when nausea hits 

she just needs to be home.

The two of us have spent a lot of days together this term.

She is too tired or sick or sore to go to school,

and there's not much she can do but 

watch TV.  

Reading is not possible, 

and she can't ever get back to sleep.

The traditional advice is to take aspirin 

and "sleep it off", but this has no effect.

But hopefully the end is in sight,

tomorrow we have a long-awaited appointment

with a doctor who has ordered

all sorts of interesting bloodtests

to find triggers,

and we have also been seeing a physio who specialises

in the Barral treatment, which might help over time.

 The girls and I have also been together a lot on the weekends.

Steve has been involved in various music performances lately,

playing in a musical, and a chamber music concert 

most recently.

On Mothers Day he had to be at an all-day rehearsal.

However he and the girls gave me all sorts of lovely presents

and we girls enjoyed a walk in the sunshine,

when most of these photos were taken, 

with my phone.

A neighbour's pumpkin growing on the sunny side of the fence.

I've been doing some casual teaching, 

when not at home with Laura,

and the weekly round of piano teaching

and the girls' activities has continued,

all not leaving me a bit time-poor.

The weather has cooled down,

keeping me close to the heater

a little too often.

Mum had her 70th Birthday party last weekend.

It was a lot of preparation for Dad and I;

we organised games and I made

invitations, nametags and placecards.

The party was a great success in the end

and lots of fun,  Mum loved it,

the stress of getting ready for it was all forgotten.

*

When I look back on the last weeks

since our Tasmania holiday

and wonder where the time has gone,

I see that I have "achieved" some things.

I cared for my sick daughter,

researched and went to appointments;

I helped Dad with Mum's party;

I provided food for family,

and sometimes even clean laundry.

I led bible study,

ran a Stampin' Up! party,

earned income by teaching,

and a few more things besides.

Really, when I list it out like that

I don't know why I feel frustrated.

But I do.

I guess the term just didn't turn out

like I planned it to.

Saturday night's sunset as we gathered around the campfire.

This last weekend the girls and I went to

our church's annual weekend away.

The speaker commented on our 

achievement-driven culture and 

our quest for freedom.

People around us want to be 'free

to do what they want, in the way that they want',

and that "freedom" normally boils 

down to trying to achieve one's desires.

*

The Bible doesn't call us to achieve anything,

but to love God, to obey and trust,

and to love and care for and encourage other people.

Yes, I have responsibilities

- dinners still need to be cooked,

the house cleaned, money earned - 

I am not supposed to be a loving syrupy fairy

with a head full of fluff -

but achievements are not to be my main focus.

This is a hard call for me.

"Coincidentally" I've come across 

a few great blog posts this morning that made me think

along the same lines, here and here, both worth reading.

*

I wonder what would happen,

if I stopped focusing on my lists and my plans,

and listened to what God wants me to be?

Perhaps it's that kind of freedom

that I'm craving, 

rather than a ticked-off list of my projects.

*

So these are my thoughts today,

as I sit at home, 

with Laura home from school again.

*

What are you thinking about?